"It" Has To Be Done

It's that time of the week again. I dread it every time. Maybe I could skip it this week. I look and I can see that it is not possible. I have to do it now or it won't get done. It's still night morning. It's so dark out except for the single orange security light on the corner of my house. Just past that is darkness. I pick it up from the kitchen. Jesus it's so heavy. I drag it out the back door. It's so quiet. Too quiet. I'm just tripping but I can't help it. After I step outside I check twice to make sure the door is locked. Heaven forbid someone sneaks in the house and waits for me to Finnish what has to be done. That's a huge fear I have every week when it's time. That while I'm getting it done someone who is watching in the shadows creeps in while I'm not looking waiting to overpower me and stab me 18 times then strangle me to death. Yes I watch a little bit too much true crime shows but I feel it helps me learn how to better prepare myself, how to protect myself. I see that the door is indeed locked. I can feel assured in that area but now its time for the scarier part. I must take everything and drag it down the long dirt driveway. I'm in the country so after I past that orange security light its pitch black. I'm walking briskly. It's so heavy slowing me down. The stars are so pretty but it only distracts me for a minute. WHAT WAS THAT!! I swear I saw something in the bushes. Keep walking. Walk faster. Now I'm hearing things. It's just animals but I can't help but think what if. What if it's a serial killer lurking in the shadows waiting to strike. I could almost hear him breathing waiting in the bushes. Snap out of it. I really need to stop watching so many of those shows. There is nothing there. Finally I've reached the end of the driveway and I can leave it there. Oh my god! Did I really lock the door? I know I have. Still the what if creeps in.  My boys are in there looking all cute asleep in their beds. I walk back as fast as I can trying to keep from twisting my ankle on rocks on the driveway. I reach the door and it is locked. I hurriedly unlock it and rush inside and slam the door shut. I double check to make sure I've locked it back up. I breath a sigh of relief. I made it. The boys are safe. I'm alive!

What was the "it" that I was dragging to the end of the driveway? What was the "it" that has to be done every week? Well the trash of course silly. You didn't know how dangerous it is to take out the trash did you. That's the only reason I need a man is to take out my trash every week it's not safe out there for a single mother.

I've Been Hoodwinked!!!

Omg my sister has been wanting me to write a blog about this experience for a while. It's so embarrassing and it's something straight out of a comedy.

So I've been on this dating site called Plenty of Fish. I started talking to a guy who was a soldier. Living by Fort Benning it's rare if you meet a guy who is not a soldier. Anyways I digress that's a whole other story. We talked online and on the phone for a couple of weeks. He sounded like a nice guy. He sent me a picture of himself and he wasn't bad looking at all. He liked scary movies like I do. So one night I was talking to him on the phone then he had to go because he was going to a party. I called the next day in the morning and it was his roommate that answered his phone. So I'm thinking this is strange. He starts talking to me. Telling me where he is from and how he knows him and what he does. He sounded so cute. He then starts to hit on me. I was like omg what kind of dude macs on their friends chick you know. I wasn't dating the guy so I flirted back and everything. I was like man this dude sounds really cute. I kept asking for him to send me a pic. He kept giving me different excuses. Ladies that's a warning sign. I ignored it because I keep giving people the benefit of a doubt. I like to give them a chance. I am not doing that anymore. So the dude I had been talking to wakes up and I start talking to him and we were joking about how his friend was hitting on me and then he has to start getting dressed so i let him go. His friend starts texting me on his roommates phone and he eventually invites me to breakfast with them. I'm like cool. I'd love to have breakfast with two hot guys. Not to mention a free breakfast anyways. I tell them to give me an hour. I get all dolled up and wear some booty poppin skinny jeans. A cute top that showed some cleavage. I had my hair down and it was a perfect hair day. My makeup was on point. I stand back for one last look and I'm like damn I look good. So I text them stating that I was on my way. Then warning sign number two pops up. He was like are you sure you wanna have breakfast with us? That was his room mate. I'm like what the fuck. Dude do you want me to come or not? I'm thinking they just didn't wanna be stuck having breakfast with me. But the guy I had been talking to was like no no we want you to come he's just worried cause we aren't dressed to impress they just threw something on. I was like OK then I'm on my way. As I'm getting closer to waffle house. I'm getting all excited more because I'm getting a free breakfast and second I'm gonna be hanging out with some hot dudes or so  I thought. He texts me telling me that they are in the back towards the restrooms. I park my car, take one last look at myself and walked in. I turn the corner. I am instantly screaming. OMG OMG OMG. Of course this was all in my head. My outward appearance was warm and friendly with a bright smile on my face. But in my head I was totally freaking out. The guy who was the room mate of the guy I had been talking to had a deformed face. Not extremely but deformed. Like around his mouth. I was like damn you really can't trust a voice over the phone. The guy I had originally been talking to looked normal enough. So in my head I'm thinking am I going to continue to walk towards them and sit with them or am I going to turn around and run. I decided well what the hell I'm here and I'm hungry. I shook their hands and took a seat. I just ordered a waffle with sweet tea to drink. they were drinking coffee and I don't remember what they ate. We made small talk and I could tell that there was something off with his roommate. He was a bit slow it seemed like which blew my mind because I had no idea while I was talking to him on the phone. He sounded completely normal. As we are talking  the guy that I had met online keeps his mouth kind of covered. Warning  sign number three. Then we was talking about something funny and he started laughing and I could then see why exactly he was hiding his mouth. He had some teeth missing in the front. I was like no friggin way! Are you kidding me! So we go to leave. I didn't even hug them. I said thank you for the breakfast. They kept asking me if I wanted to go to their place to watch a movie and I said no I have to get back to my kids. He texted me a couple of times after that but I never responded and he eventually got the hint. On the way home from the awkward experience I made a mental note. Make sure when they send me a headshot I tell them to show me a big toothy smile. No pic equals no date. I hate wasting a hot outfit and a great hair day.

If you have an online dating horror story post a comment so I don't feel alone hahaha