I'd like to tell y'all a mortifying experience I had not too long ago. Extremely embarrassing. I called my sister up as soon as it happen and said what would be the most embarrassing thing that could happen to you while being intimate with your husband? She said shit on yourself. Well although that is pretty embarrassing and not to mention nasty, that is not what happened. IT WAS WORSE! Anyways everyone needs a laugh and this one will make you laugh.
So I was having my "friend" come over one night. No one special he just comes over when I call and spends a little time with me. I tell him to come over around 9. Usually I wait till 10 to be sure my parents aren't going to be just dropping by but there was nothing going on so I didn't think nothing of it. I take a shower get all dolled up excited about him coming over. He texts me stating that he is here so I put my phone on silent. So as not to be rude. We talk and hangout and what not. We were together for awhile then it was time for him to leave. I walk him to the door tell him goodnight and drive safely and blah blah whatever and then I grab a snack and sit my butt on the couch and watch some t.v. I just started relaxing when I thought I heard something moving at the back of the house. I was like no way I'm just tripping. Then all of a sudden there was a man standing in the dinning room door way with a shotgun. OMG! OMG! OMG! As my mind slowly began to process what I was seeing I began to realize that it was my daddy. What the fuck? He was like why didn't you answer the door? I'm like what are you talking about I didn't hear anything. Then he was like what is wrong with your phone you didn't hear it ring? Again I was like no. He said who's car was that out front? That's when it hit me. OMG! HOW LONG WAS HE KNOCKING ON THE DOOR? HOW LONG HAD HE BEEN TRYING TO GET IN? I told him that it was just a friend. He was like who was it, that motherfucker? Referring to my ex husband because my parents have this huge unnecessary fear of me going back to him. I was like no daddy. Trying my hardest to avoid it but he just kept prying for a name. I was like he's my friend Shawn. He was like who is he? I'm like nobody. Then he starts telling me that he had came up here banging on the doors and calling my phone and got worried. He then drove home told momma that he couldn't reach me and said he had a bad feeling, grabbed his shotgun and came back to my house. I had left the back screen door unlocked so he was able to use his key to get in the house and that's when he found me in the living room. He then asks why the guy sneaked out the front? Then I was like omg did he see my dad? I tell daddy he wasn't sneaking out he was just leaving. I really had no idea he was trying to get in. Daddy then chastised me some more for leaving the back screen door unlocked and told me I need to be answering the phone and I don't remember much after that. I immediately was blocking that situation out of my head. Just imagine the questions your asking yourself. What did he hear? Did he try talking to the guy? I don't know. All I know is as soon as the guy went out the door I sat down on the couch and then daddy was there. SO EMBARRASSING! My mom was like you should of locked the screen door. I've slowly recovered from that incident. I've also learned a huge lesson. Always stick to 10 never earlier.
A little update for y'all on the guy. A couple of days later I text the guy to see if he wanted to come over and hangout. He told me he had to work. I was like how bout after work. Then he said he had church. I was like oooookkkkk how about after church unless you just don't wanna see me. He then text me something that said it's not you. You are great. I just want to wait until I'm married to be intimately involved with someone. A friend of mine is doing that so she can avoid any heartbreak and blah blah blah. I did not respond. If he just didn't wanna chill with me anymore that is all he had to say instead of giving me that lame ass excuse that made him sound more like a female then ever. I knew as soon as I found out that he was a cheerleader to leave him alone. Oh well he talked too much anyways. I wonder if he saw my dad and got scared. I'll never know.
No comments:
Post a Comment